Sun shines again after pregnancy loss. All That is Seen and Unseen; A Journey Through a First Trimester MiscarriageI learned today that I am NORMAL! I am NOT alone in my feelings about my new baby following my pregnancy loss. It was so comforting to learn that. I had the feeling that my emotions were normal but I really needed to hear this. Did you know that if you have experienced a pregnancy loss and give birth to your rainbow baby that it’s normal to feel like you will lose your baby? That it’s normal to be scared that your baby will die? That it’s okay to feel these things?

I wasn’t sure. I second guessed and thought that I was beginning to go crazy. After all, my rainbow baby is here so why do I still get anxious and worried about losing him? I have lost. If you are reading this, you may have lost too; and you may have some of the same feelings.

I expected some anxiety and I don’t feel like it’s consuming me at all but it started to worry me, especially when I began to cry and beg my baby not to leave me. As if he has some control over this. As if I have control over it.

I learned that night time is one of the most common times to feel this way. I learned that it’s normal because this is a vulnerable time. Both of us are sleeping and there is no way to prevent something bad from happening while we are in a deep slumber. It’s okay. I am okay. WE are okay.

– Breaking the silence of First Trimester Miscarriage

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