I was starting to get excited about you. I had been thinking about you for over eight months now but I have been scared to even think about bringing you to life. There are so many risks, after all, at our age. When I think back about how I envisioned parenthood, this is not what…
Category: first trimester miscarriage
Miscarriage Options
WARNING – GRAPHIC CONTENT – Miscarriage Options I am having a miscarriage, what are my options? Which one should I choose? This is one of the most common questions when someone is experiencing a miscarriage. I know that when I experienced my miscarriage, it was the first question that came to mind after the initial…
Just Breathe
I didn’t want her when I conceived her. She was an inconvenience when those two lines appeared. How could this be happening? Now? Why couldn’t she have come just months before? Before my entire path in life was falling into place? Before my dreams had finally come true? I was being childish. I was being…
Bereavement Services for Miscarriage and Stillbirth
My bereavement services for miscarriage and stillbirth were featured at Denver Natural Mom in honor of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month. I was so honored to be able to share. There was so much to share and just not enough time. Kathryn Roman with Denver Natural Mom did an amazing job of putting this…
Candlelight Vigil to Remember Babies
On October 15th, 2014 at 7pm, families gathered for a Candlelight Vigil and Remembrance at Rock A My Baby Family Enrichment Center in Castle Rock, CO to remember and honor babies who were lost to miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS and other reasons. The event was hosted by Dragonflies For Ruby in coordination with Rock A My…
Miscarriage Announcement
Miscarriage Announcement When I was searching for a way to announce the death of our baby, I searched the internet far and wide. There was nothing that seemed appropriate for announcing a miscarriage. I wanted something similar to a baby announcement because I wanted it more formal than the text message I sent the day we…
The Angel Memorial in Parker, Colorado
I have blogged about the Rowan Tree Foundation’s Child Loss Angel Memorial in Parker Colorado before. It is a place I often visit even though Ruby does not have a tile or memorial stone there. I took the kids with me last Saturday as we waited for a friend from Stillbirthday to arrive. The Stillbirthday Birth Professionals Bereavement Workshop was taking place the following…
Sharing Our Miscarriage
I went to Lowe’s to pick up a small shrub to place in front of the phone box that will be near Ruby’s garden today. I searched through the “left-over’s” since it is no longer really planting season and couldn’t find much of anything that I liked. I remembered the night before at my mother-in-law’s…
Miscarriage and Stillbirth Funeral
Several months after I lost Ruby in 2010, I assisted with a mortuary escort at one of the local hospitals I was working security for. I remember being called to meet the mortuary representative at the main entrance to the hospital. My heart sank because inside, I knew they were picking up a baby. Adults…
Infertility to Fertility – The Loss of a Possibility
I hate the term “Loss of a Possibility” but what has been happening to my body lately has certainly brought this about. In a previous post, The Silent Battle of Infertility and Miscarriage, I wrote, “I know what it’s like to suffer with infertility. To try so hard to have a baby yet every time…