It’s a term I have heard over and over. In fact, I have used the term in the past but now, I can no longer use the term. It’s offensive! It makes my stomach turn each time I hear it and it’s now considered a trigger. Earthside…or as most often used: “Bringing Baby Earthside.” A…
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Dear Self Magazine: Change on Miscarriage Starts With You
Self Magazine published an article on August 5, 2016 entitled When You’re Having a Miscarriage but Have to Work Anyway, by Zahra Barnes. This article helps bring to light many of the pressing issues women who miscarry face such has social stigmas and having to work through a miscarriage. Many women don’t realize that miscarriage…
BL and AL – Do you use these terms?
BL and AL. What do these letters mean? What are their significance? I was going through my Facebook “Memories” today and noticed I was using these terms. I know I haven’t shared what they mean yet but I know many of you will know what they mean. As I scrolled through the memories for today, I…
The Dark Side
It’s hard to believe that there is actually a dark side to pregnancy loss organizations. At least some of them and to know that a dark side exists, damages trust. At a time when families need love and support the most, some are being turned away and they don’t even know it. It’s almost similar…
Comparing Loss Serves No One
“Comparing Loss Serves No One” was originally published on December 2, 2015 at Doula Spot. Recently in a group, bereaved mothers were comparing the pain they experienced based on the age of their baby. One woman shared she had miscarriages so her pain could not be nearly as painful as a friend who had lost…
Janet Street Porter, How Shameful of You
A few days ago, I learned that Tana Ramsay (wife of Gordon Ramsay) has suffered a miscarriage. As a perinatal loss specialist who serves families enduring pregnancy loss, my heart hurts for them. Watching how the media is treating them can be both heartwarming and horrific. Here, you can see Janet Street Porter displaying the…
How to Prepare for Your Miscarriage
You’ve just been told that your baby/pregnancy isn’t viable, that there is no longer a heartbeat, or that you will be miscarrying; so what do you do now? Chances are, you were sent home with medication to induce the miscarriage or told to just go home and wait it out but do you really know…
Miscarriages are NOT Heavy Periods
“Miscarriages are like heavy periods.” I don’t understand where this phrase comes from at all. After diagnosis of a miscarriage, many women hear the words, “It will be like a heavy period.” Sometimes the medical professional adds, “And you might see more clots and pass tissue.” There is rarely mention of pain or contractions. Do…
Dear Emergency Departments Everywhere
Dear Emergency Departments everywhere… STOP SENDING WOMEN HOME WHO ARE HAVING A MISCARRIAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I really cannot stress this enough. It’s getting very old hearing the words, “There is nothing we can do, go home.” Is that really all you have to say? Do you really thing there is nothing you can do? Let me explain…
On this day, May 11
Last year, he was born on May 11. Silent and still on the ultrasound just days before, we knew his birth was inevitable. It was devastating. Our 4th and thought-to-be last child, gone so quickly. We were so excited to be pregnant with him, naturally and at our age. It was a miracle. But he was…