I have blogged about the Rowan Tree Foundation’s Child Loss Angel Memorial in Parker Colorado before. It is a place I often visit even though Ruby does not have a tile or memorial stone there. I took the kids with me last Saturday as we waited for a friend from Stillbirthday to arrive. The Stillbirthday Birth Professionals Bereavement Workshop was taking place the following day and my other friend Kelly was bringing the host to see the memorial.

As my sons and I waited for their arrival, the sun was setting. The weather was nearly perfect. A slight chill in the wind, bellowing clouds in the sky from a passing storm and the sun peaked through the clouds just over the mountain tops to the west.

We walked around the memorial reading the stones once again and saw the names of babies from the friends we knew. The flowers were still in bloom because of all the rain we had received over the summer and hummingbirds stopped by to visit and feed from the nectar of the flowers.

I noticed a tiny toy airplane on the ground next to an electric candle. A small rubber duck and bouquet were placed under a child’s name. The card had the number 8 on it. I sat there for a brief moment in utter sadness but also extremely happy that someone still took the time to remember their child. A few years had passed since he died.

It didn’t take long for Timmy to notice the items on the ground. I watched in awe to see his reaction. Timmy took a seat on the ground and began pointing at the items. He didn’t reach for them. It was almost as if he knew the sacred meaning of these items. They belonged to another boy. They were not his to play with. I captured this photo.

Timmy sat for a few moments and talked almost as if he was talking to someone about the items there. Not too long after he sat down, he stood up and walked away. We were at the memorial for over an hour yet he never stopped at the toys or bouquet again. Once more, it was as if he knew these were not to be played with because they belonged to someone else. I never had to tell him no, he just knew.

As the sun continued to set, our friends arrived and we shared what we knew about the memorial and the events that take place here. I was asked if Ruby had a tile here and I was sad to say that she did not (yet). We still want to place a tile here and I know one day we will have the funds to do so.

If you haven’t yet visited this memorial, you really should take the time. Attend one of the events here and place your child’s name on a tile or memorial stone. This is a wonderful and sacred place to come visit your child.

– Breaking the silence of First Trimester Miscarriage

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