Just Pray Song by Moriah Peters and Rhett Walker It’s been three weeks since the Aurora Shooting. Life is slowly getting back to “normal” for me. It took me one week of extreme grieving and a meeting at the memorial site to view the theater to help me through this. I still have much to…
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Big Fat Negative!
Those on the “TTC” Journey which means “Trying to Conceive” understand the Big Fat Negative or rather, BFN. Yes. That’s where we are at in our journey…AGAIN! It doesn’t matter how you feel as you pee on the stick and anxiously await two lines. But when only one line appears…the control line, disappointment flows. Expected…
Criticism about my book
I have been waiting for the criticism about my book and finally found it, although it happened two months ago. I was checking SEO stuff on my book when I came across a follow-up post on “The Broken Ovary,” a website dedicated to helping women who suffer from PCOS. Since I am a person who…
Searching
I was talking with a good friend recently about what I want to do with the rest of my life. I have several passions; helping people (mostly women), writing, and spending time with my family. For 12 years, I was so focused on police work. I couldn’t wait to achieve that dream and work as…
Ovulation
Ovulation was successful. I have very mixed feelings. On one hand, I would really love to have another child but starting over feels so overwhelming. The lack of sleep, long nights, and finding a baby sitter to get away but I know that’s all relative and I have so much family here that can AND…
Aurora Shooting Mimics Miscarriage Grief
Day 6 after the Aurora shooting. So, I have been literally too exhausted to journal. That’s not like me at all but everything from this shooting is draining me and as I said before, I am not related to a victim. The shooting has taken so much out of me and most days, it’s too…
Aurora Shooting Day Three
It’s so difficult to watch everyone else go on their family weekends, go hiking, walking, running, just plain having fun, etc while I spent the entire weekend in bed, sleeping for well over 30 hours, pushing my son away on my brother-in-law’s family because I have absolutely no energy, all the while feeling guilty for…
Don’t Be Sad For Me Poem
This was a poem I submitted for publication in an online magazine. It was not chosen for publication so I am sharing it here. This was something I wrote following a friend stating she was sad for me because I was not working full-time as a police officer. Don’t be sad for me, because I…
Trying Again?
I ordered fertility meds again. Not sure what else to say about this fact but I DID order medications. This doesn’t mean I will take them, but they are there for me to use if I so choose. It’s not as simple as just taking them though. They have to be timed perfectly. Everything with…
Already July? A bit on infertility.
It’s July 1st! We are over half way through the year. Where is the time going? I didn’t blog last week. Work had me consumed. It is getting frustrating to be getting home so late and I continue to work on a way to be home for my son. He starts school in August and…